I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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