So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Randomize