Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
