life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
