I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
ugly people sure do ruin things
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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