After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Randomize
