well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
