It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
