so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? šš
I get sad thinking about all the sex Iām missing out on because of the virus
I instituted āquarantine and chillā months ago. Itās not like penises go soft just because theyāre working at home.
Randomize
