She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
