stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I am naked and annoyed.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
