CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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