i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
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