her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
