i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
only if we run a train.
done.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
