Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize