my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
