then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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