Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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