That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
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