watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
