we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
