perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize