so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize