We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
two words: eviction party
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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