i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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