i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
