During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
