Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
lets start a swedish sibling band together
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
