GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
