He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
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