So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Just cropdusted the office
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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