Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize
