Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
