whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
