He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
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