I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Randomize
