Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Randomize
