Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
even my farts smell like vagina
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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