Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
