So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
never play flip cup with pint glasses
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Randomize
