Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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