what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
