Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
