you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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