Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
