they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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