dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
