He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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