You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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