Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
